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Hi! |
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The Year
of the Rabbit will bring the return of the bunnygirl
costume and the world will be a deeper place for it. This
is how it should be. Hubba hubba! |
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Can't say
as I would be bothered by that. Cheers! |
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Cheers! |
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Don't
you think that's a sexist symbol and it objectifies
her? |
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Perhaps.
Everything is a sexist symbol if you want it to be.
Neckties are sexist too. Most of the costumes that your
card captor friend wears could be classified as sexist
yet they're seen as being 'cute' because they're designed
by a woman. |
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So where's the party? |
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Right
here! See we have these cookies... well, we had some
cookies and this bottle of Pocari Sweat—ick! Jim drank
out of it—and uh... our cheerful attitudes. |
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Losers. |
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She fades out and the room, full of mist for some
time now (or was that hot air?) begins to clear and
blurry images appear in random locations then fade out
almost as fast as they are fully visible. |
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The
cycle of popularity of shows shortens even more. With the
shorter 13 episode seasons made popular by
the late night programs, the number of original series
will increase and the lifetime of each will be noticeably
shorter. Advertising and pumping in the anime magazines
will increase dramatically and will start months before
the show. Merchandising will commence the day the show is
first aired. Six months later nobody will even remember
it. |
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Will that be the case for very popular shows like, say,
EVANGELION too? |
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Eva-what? |
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EVANGELION! The big hit show of the last while! |
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Oh yeah, that old thing. See, I've been 4 months into the
future. In 4 months nobody even remembers that EVANGELION. |
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Like
some stone age legend that is passed down from the
ancient ones. |
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This
will also mean that shows are released on video much
faster than before. Most people will do all their
collecting in one shot. The only ones who will be saved
at the end of the world are the ones who buy
CARD CAPTOR SAKURA of course. |
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Of
course. Wait! End of the world?! The
world is going to end in 1999?! |
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At the
stroke of midnight January 1, 2000 the world as we know
it will end. We'll discover that anime has been like a
training session for the next millennium when the anime
superior beings reveal themselves and take control. The
superior beings will be yellow and have round heads with
little black eyes that are the same size as their nose,
wings and lion tails. In other words they'll be
magnificent and awesome. Anime contains their laws,
which will then be the laws everywhere. (This includes
the laws of physics.) Those who don't watch anime will be
forced to either catch up or have to dress like Heidi.
(This is for both sexes.) The Heidi people will become
the new untouchable caste throughout the world and they
will be assigned all the menial jobs that robots don't
cover. They'll live in big cages and be under
surveillance 24 hours a day. Their wooden shoes will
contain transponders so the anime people can keep track
of them. They'll be constantly begging for anime goods
and discs so they can try to get back in society but
their dislike for anime and inability to come to grips
with it will mark them more than the permanent red
circular tattoos on their cheeks that are supposed to be
blushes or whatever those designers drew on there.
Characters with red cheeks are all losers anyway. Like
that electric rat thing. Everyone will worship the
elegant and beautiful superior beings and know that
they're the coolest. |
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Yellow
round headed beings take over the world and make lots of
people dress up like Heidi? |
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It will
happen! Yes! Yes it will! |
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How many
arms do you have? |
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OK, it's
time for the visions to end. Time for you two to leave
and me to go to sleep. Bye! Bye! |
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Although they wanted to tell me more I had quite
enough of their weird visions and pushed them both out
the window into the night. Afterwards I reflected on what
an interesting year 1998 was and that 1999 promises even
more new fun and challenges. (I thought of the bunnygirl
a lot too.) |
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Good
luck in
1999!  |
